San Diego introverts

Sunset is when the introverts come out to play in San Diego. The crowds are long gone, and the sand has gone cool underfoot. I love this time of day at the city’s beaches. I never know whom or what I’ll see. Children, lingering in the chilly surf. Couples on vacation. Photographers like me. Fading words in the sand. Ruby red feathered seaweed. For me, it was my wife (Carol Kim) and the campaign she ran for San Diego City Council in 2014. Some people might think introverts are self-absorbed and uncaring about others, but that’s not a fair characterization. Introverts can be just as idealistic and driven as anyone else, or even more so. See how businesses are responding to COVID - Reviews on Group Activities in San Diego, CA - Ballistic Bubble Soccer, Battle Axe San Diego, Scavengers Beer & Adventure Tours, Hot Tub Cruisin, Murder n' Mayhem, Game Night San Diego, Social Cycle, Cruise San Diego, FrogQuest Photo Scavenger Hunts, Ultrazone Laser Tag San Diego voters will decide on school board election reform in November Ballot measure would replace at-large school board elections, which some say are racially discriminatory, with by-district ... Society thinks introverts are socially awkward, boring, and don't enjoy conversing with others. That is far from the truth. We are people who re-charge by spending time with ourselves, enjoy peace, and find happiness in quieter environments. We prefer smaller intimate groups filled with meaningful conversations over energizing, loud, and large ... What Introverts Love About San Diego. By jackie on December 22, 2015 Tweet. Pin It. Tweet. Pin It. This Article first seemed on The Pacific Ocean is anything else However pacified. The Pacific at all times desires something: sailors, surfers, enthusiasts, Kids, my feet, the Solar for dinner. The noise—some evenings—is ... Outside of the clinic, David enjoys spending time with his wife Lauren by exploring San Diego or enjoying peaceful days at home. He is an avid ice hockey fan and even plays occasionally. Dr. Tamara Pessin, DPT. Tamara graduated with honors from San Diego State University in 2014 with her bachelor’s degree in Kinesiology. Where social distancing can trigger relief for introverts, it can cause anxiety and a temptation to break distancing guidelines for extroverts. Is Social Isolation Easier for Introverts? – San Diego – Sharp Health News I don’t think I took much issue with the idea of a person calling themselves introverted until an infamous comic told me that (as an extrovert) I’m basically a predator trying to steal energy juice and don’t take it personally, it’s just that interaction is expensive and introverts don’t want to spend it on something wasteful. Excuse me, but sorry for annoying you with my friendship. For all who identify as introverted in the greater north San Diego county area, this is the group for you. We can craft gatherings that make introverts comfortable and connected! We currently have 3 organizers. If you would like to be a event host, let me know. We let anyone host, subject to a few rules.

[M] 26 Anywhere/ SO CAL /San Diego/ looking for genuine homies local or ANYWHERE plus if you are alt or into punk/pwv and down to go to shows hmu (gamers and weebs are welcome introverts on thin ice extroverts on the wire)

2020.09.25 14:04 mchngrl199 [M] 26 Anywhere/ SO CAL /San Diego/ looking for genuine homies local or ANYWHERE plus if you are alt or into punk/pwv and down to go to shows hmu (gamers and weebs are welcome introverts on thin ice extroverts on the wire)

Hello yes
Just looking for a friend or two from anywhere in the world that is interested in having some sort of long lasting friendship or what ever if you are local or close that's a plus I'm trying to stop going to shows by myself would be gnarly going to tj, LA or el Centro with someone close by and perhaps do things with.
Is cool though anyone trying to be friends are welcome i work a lot atm and game a lot during the night i have other interest but rather pull them through conversation but high key consider myself jack of all trades i have a bit knowledge on a lot of things that i feel are unimportant welcome to introduce me to more useless facts.
here is a few of my - music interest with some games i sometimes play and anime I've enjoyed.
But honestly anyone is welcome to dm i dont care how lame you think you might be or shy or what ever the case might be i also have no friends and that's pretty much the point of trying to see if anyone is compatible here right??
submitted by mchngrl199 to Needafriend [link] [comments]

2020.09.25 14:04 mchngrl199 [M] 26 Anywhere/ SO CAL /San Diego/ looking for genuine homies local or ANYWHERE plus if you are alt or into punk/pwv and down to go to shows hmu (gamers and weebs are welcome introverts on thin ice extroverts on the wire)

Hello yes

Just looking for a friend or two from anywhere in the world that is interested in having some sort of long lasting friendship or what ever if you are local or close that's a plus I'm trying to stop going to shows by myself would be gnarly going to tj, LA or el Centro with someone close by and perhaps do things with.
Is cool though anyone trying to be friends are welcome i work a lot atm and game a lot during the night i have other interest but rather pull them through conversation but high key consider myself jack of all trades i have a bit knowledge on a lot of things that i feel are unimportant welcome to introduce me to more useless facts.
here is a few of my - music interest with some games i sometimes play and anime I've enjoyed.
But honestly anyone is welcome to dm i dont care how lame you think you might be or shy or what ever the case might be i also have no friends and that's pretty much the point of trying to see if anyone is compatible here right??
submitted by mchngrl199 to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]

2020.09.21 12:45 SimplyIlluminatied 30 [M4F] Japan/SoCal/Anywhere - Pssssst. I might be the one.. no seriously! Click me!

Hellooooo world! I am me, SimplyIlluminatied, and you can get my actual name after you submit a voucher for an astounding relationship, cringe. Kidding of course.
I'm 30 years old, living in Japan for the time being before I move to San Diego mid-2021. I am 5'11" and a half french/german dude. What does that really mean? I can't tan for shit and you can call me Casper. Anywho, I work as an Analyst analyzing a whole bunch of random data and making the sauce, or sausage as some would say.
Why am I here? Well.. for communication and motivation. I don't really talk to anyone outside of work, largely due to the varying time zones and perhaps my people skills have deteriorated over time no thanks to a certain virus. I'm introverted, because all of the tests tell me so, but I also thrive off of human interaction as a means of motivation. Without it.. I'm usually not being very productive at all. I'm missing that person where we become a team and help each other grow, do things that we don't really want to do (like college homework), and act as each others personal hype man/woman.
What do I like? Great question! In a "normal" world, I thoroughly enjoyed going to music festivals (of the EDM type). I now enjoy watching anime, playing video games across any system, reading fantasy fiction, and cooking. I can't bake for the life of me, but cooking is a different story. Nothing brings more joy than cooking a meal for someone and watching their reaction when they take their first bite. It can either be liberating or crushing. Oh the suspense! I promise it won't be anything like Fear Factor and that the food will be delicious.
Final notes! I've only made it to the ripe age of 30 because of humor, and probably a whole lot of luck. What should you take away from that? I like to make jokes, even at my own expense, and more often than not I'll say something that will probably make you pause and go "What?!". But hey, it's funny right?
Let's talk! Get to know one another. Play some games together. Share some favorite anime titles or books. Or just shoot the shit and see where things go.
Stay safe my friends.
submitted by SimplyIlluminatied to r4r [link] [comments]

2020.09.21 12:43 SimplyIlluminatied 30 [M4F] Japan/SoCal/Anywhere - Hey you, yeah.. you.

Hellooooo world! I am me, SimplyIlluminatied, and you can get my actual name after you submit a voucher for an astounding relationship, cringe. Kidding of course.
I'm 30 years old, living in Japan for the time being before I move to San Diego mid-2021. I am 5'11" and a half french/german dude. What does that really mean? I can't tan for shit and you can call me Casper. Anywho, I work as an Analyst analyzing a whole bunch of random data and making the sauce, or sausage as some would say.
Why am I here? Well.. for communication and motivation. I don't really talk to anyone outside of work, largely due to the varying time zones and perhaps my people skills have deteriorated over time no thanks to a certain virus. I'm introverted, because all of the tests tell me so, but I also thrive off of human interaction as a means of motivation. Without it.. I'm usually not being very productive at all. I'm missing that person where we become a team and help each other grow, do things that we don't really want to do (like college homework), and act as each others personal hype man/woman.
What do I like? Great question! In a "normal" world, I thoroughly enjoyed going to music festivals (of the EDM type). I now enjoy watching anime, playing video games across any system, reading fantasy fiction, and cooking. I can't bake for the life of me, but cooking is a different story. Nothing brings more joy than cooking a meal for someone and watching their reaction when they take their first bite. It can either be liberating or crushing. Oh the suspense! I promise it won't be anything like Fear Factor and that the food will be delicious.
Final notes! I've only made it to the ripe age of 30 because of humor, and probably a whole lot of luck. What should you take away from that? I like to make jokes, even at my own expense, and more often than not I'll say something that will probably make you pause and go "What?!". But hey, it's funny right?
Let's talk! Get to know one another. Play some games together. Share some favorite anime titles or books. Or just shoot the shit and see where things go.
Stay safe my friends.
submitted by SimplyIlluminatied to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]

2020.09.21 12:32 SimplyIlluminatied 30M [Friendship] [Relationship] Japan/SoCal

Hellooooo world! I am me, SimplyIlluminatied, and you can get my actual name after you submit a voucher for friendship, cringe. Kidding of course.
I'm 30 years old, living in Japan for the time being before I move to San Diego mid-2021. I am 5'11" and a half french/german dude. What does that really mean? I can't tan for shit and you can call me Casper. Anywho, I work as an Analyst analyzing a whole bunch of random data and making the sauce, or sausage as some would say.
Why am I here? Well.. for communication and motivation. I don't really talk to anyone outside of work, largely due to the varying time zones and perhaps my people skills have deteriorated over time no thanks to a certain virus. I'm introverted, because all of the tests tell me so, but I also thrive off of human interaction as a means of motivation. Without it.. I'm usually not being very productive at all.
What do I like? Great question! In a "normal" world, I thoroughly enjoyed going to music festivals (of the EDM type). I now enjoy watching anime, playing video games across any system, reading fantasy fiction, and cooking. I can't bake for the life of me, but cooking is a different story. Nothing brings more joy than cooking a meal for someone and watching their reaction when they take their first bite. It can either be liberating or crushing. Oh the suspense!
Final notes! I've only made it to the ripe age of 30 because of humor, and probably a whole lot of luck. What should you take away from that? I like to make jokes, even at my own expense, and more often than not I'll say something that will probably make you pause and go "What?!". But hey, it's funny right?
Let's talk! Get to know one another. Play some games together. Share some favorite anime titles or books. Or just shoot the shit.
Stay safe my friends.
submitted by SimplyIlluminatied to MeetPeople [link] [comments]

2020.09.05 09:28 1techno_org Techno 2020 AUGUST Megapack (882 albums - 74 GB)

Download Techno 2020 AUGUST Megapack

Benoit_B-Notes_Of_Love-(ITLIntl05)-WEBFLAC-2020-XiVERO ()
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submitted by 1techno_org to u/1techno_org [link] [comments]

2020.09.01 08:34 llst11 I don't know how to title my story, but please hear me.

Hello Everyone,
I just finished a bottle of wine, so with an assist of the great power of alcohol - since I am a coward - I liked to share my story.
The story begins in 2014, I was a freshman of a veterinary medicine school, and I was in a first year orientation. As a part of ice breaking, there was a game that everyone were briefly introducing themselves to each others.
I was introverted shy boy, I was worrying about what to say, soon the game began, and I saw a girl.
She had a hazel colored short hair, wearing a glasses, wearing a purple Patagonia windbreaker, had a hemp shoulder bag, and a beautiful big smile with a dimple. The moment when I saw her, my eyes were locked on her, I could not dare to turn my eyes. Her smile, that smile was the most beautiful expression I ever saw. When she smiles, the purity, pure gesture of happiness. It was gorgeous.
I just realized by just trying to reminiscing her smile, I can feel my heartbeats are started to increasing.
Her smile, that was the most heavenly thing. I was mesmerized by her when it was my turn to introduce, I got startled, and my voice was cracking. Everybody laughed, including the girl. I was embarrassed, although I felt privileged to see her smile directly at me.
When the orientation ended, everyone were talking and becoming friends. In that huge crowd, I could not take my eyes off from her. When I realized, I was walking toward her, and stood in front of her.
She was short. I am 6.2, and her head was near my chest. She had a scent of grapefruit. Her eyes were green like emeralds. Objectively, in beauty perspective, she was not the most beautiful girl I ever saw. However, I can tell you, she was the most attractive and mesmerizing creature I ever saw.
I did not know what to say, and I was just standing in front of her like an idiot, but she was kind enough to start a conversation with me. We talked, and we found out we had many common things.
We were same age. She had a golden retriever, and I had a golden retriever. She drove a Toyota Corolla, and I drove a Corolla. She liked Jazz music especially Bill Evans who happens to be my favorite jazz musician! Hell, we even had a same favorite Subway sandwich, Meatball Marinara.
I swear I lost my track of time when I was talking with her. She was a great listener. Maintaining eye contact. I mean it was perfect.
Soon we became really close friends. We always studied together in library. Eat meals together. She and I shared a same dorm floor, so we chat and studied in each others rooms. In early morning, we always walked together with our dogs. We went weekend trips together. We wore scrubs in matching colors.
We were more than a friend, but we were not officially in relationship. No one, not her or me, nobody asked each others out. Even though our friends called us a "couple," we were not in relationship. We were in somewhere between BFF and lovers.
The reason was, at that time, I had many things on my mind. I had to take care my immigration status, working part time, family matters, military conscription, financial problems etc. Simply, I was unsure about my future. I did not want her to involve in my struggles. They are just petty excuses.
As time passes, our friendship/relationship was getting deeper and deeper.
She wanted to more involved physically and mentally. She always hugged me. Holding my hands. Leaning on me when we were sitting together. Laying her head on my laps.
One night, we were walking together at boardwalk, we were looking at dark calm ocean with soothing wave sound. We were looking at each, she placed her hand at my back of head, closed her eyes, and lips were getting closer.
But, I had to stop her and said, "I am sorry. I can't do this."
Initially, she looked confused, then tears were filling at her green eyes, then she walked away from me, but I was just standing there not even trying to stop her.
After that, we had a cold distance between us. Eventually, we started to not see each others.
Soon I had to drop out the school due to financial difficulty, supporting my family, and military conscription call.
After few years, I heard from my friend that she is going to marry someone.
I don't know why I did or what I felt at that time. Maybe lingering attachment.
At that time, I was living in Scotland, and her wedding was in San Diego.
With no hesitation, I gave a last minute notification to my boss, and bought a flight ticket.
When I saw at her wedding in distance, she looked so beautiful in white.
If I was a movie character, I would break into her wedding, disagree the wedding, snatch the bride, and runaway together to sunset, but this was reality. It was a real wedding in joy. I am just uninvited creep looking at her in a distance. I do not deserve her.
Thank you for reading a story of a drunk loser.
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2020.08.22 18:15 Jadedtj98 I’m Looking For Room in Boston Area $1150

Hi, I’m a 21 soon to be 22 (next month) aspiring real estate salesman’s whose relocating to Boston from San Diego next month and needs to find a place. After figuring out VERY quickly that San Diego and Boston housing prices aren’t to different I stopped looking for a studio and am now looking to rent a room and have one or a few roommates. Would love to have private bathroom but not having one isn’t at all a deal breaker. -I don’t have any Pets. -Would work full time while finishing my real estate course. I do drink sometimes and though I don’t usually smoke I am 420 friendly if others do. -Also am fairly introverted but am always down to kick it with cool people. - In my free time I do natural bodybuilding so I’m 9/10 times at the gym or somewhere eating. -And I would be buying a used car once I moved
Willing to pay $1150 or a little more but preferably less. And willing to pay up to 6 months of my lease up front. I’m extremely new to Reddit and don’t really know how this all works in the slightest so if you want to get in touch Message me or comment.
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2020.08.07 17:27 apathyzeal [M4F] or [M4T] 39M super fun time happy post title or whatever I don't know

I posted this once before and the response was generally positive. I'm looking for a monogamous relationship.
The good: I'm intelligent, I have been told I'm funny, I have a very unique personality, many eclectic hobbies, former Yahoo answers celebrity, technologically adept, total nerd
The bad: I do not like myself, I don't get along with most people, vegan, childfree, very introverted and requires a fair amount of alone time, sense of humor is often hard to grasp, total nerd
The neutral: 39, male, live in San Diego county, single parent to a very sweet elderly cat, sex positive, heteroromantic ace, total nerd
Hopefully this is enough to start a conversation? Please do not be shy, I do not bite as that would require breaking the social distancing rules I'm sure, total nerd
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submitted by elvis27JJul to u/elvis27JJul [link] [comments]

2020.07.24 19:48 MyNewHorizon7 32 year old guy from San Diego. Dog trainer and going to school for stenography. Introvert into crochet, movies, music, animal crossing, succulents and cacti. Dog dad (Obvs)

32 year old guy from San Diego. Dog trainer and going to school for stenography. Introvert into crochet, movies, music, animal crossing, succulents and cacti. Dog dad (Obvs) submitted by MyNewHorizon7 to gayfriendfinder [link] [comments]

2020.06.16 21:59 pineapplesnmangoes 31 F introverted but friendly nerd seeks friends

Hello! hi there I hope this day finds you well and the weather to be good. I’m not good at talking about myself but I’ll try.
I’ve learned that once you reach a certain age that it actually becomes harder to make friends and being introverted doesn’t help.
I like movies and tv shows and discussing characters and plots. I’m always open to recommendations. Lately I’ve been revisiting a lot from my childhood bc that makes me happy! I enjoy reading, fiction, high fantasy, supernatural and occult things are my favorite. I get very attached to books they’ve gotten me through some things. I’m imaginative and creative and love things that feed into that.
I play a lot of video games. I prefer story driven single player but time to time I do break out some online games. Playing with randoms gives me anxiety. Super excited for TLOU 2 and cyberpunk. I’m also just started FF XIV.
I like to think of myself as friendly and kind with an acceptable sense of humor. I am very LGBTQIA+ friendly and would love to make friends of . I love the idea of traveling but having anxiety makes airports a nightmare.
A few random things about me. I’m an animal person. I will try to help or save anything I come across. I am the girl who will dive around with a massive turtle in her passenger seat trying to find an acceptable release spot. I like growing plants and often name them. I listen to all genres of music. I can find something I like in all of them. I find history fascinating. I was once an identical twin. I LOVE the beach my dream would be to live in a sleepy little beach town. I once took the train from Orange County in CA down to San Diego and those little towns we passed seemed like a dream. My favorite ride at Disney is the Indiana Jones one. My idea of a good time is curling up in a blanket with a cup of jasmine tea with a good book or a video game.
I’m always happy to chat and meet new people of all walks of life feel free to dm me I also have discord if you’d prefer to chat there.
submitted by pineapplesnmangoes to Needafriend [link] [comments]

2020.06.07 07:27 sushilover19 26 [M4F] California / Anywhere - friendship to relationship

I am 26-year-old white / russian-jewish male, looking for friendship and maybe something greater.
I am living in LA but will be relocating farther down to Orange County / San Diego area. Definitely looking to stay in California and settle my roots here.
I am 5'10, weigh 145 lbs (fairly slim but in the process of getting back in shape :D ) Fairly introverted, but not *too* introverted.
I played the piano since I was little. Really love the outdoors, especially since relocating to California (I grew up in the mid-West). Hiking, going to the beach, and driving on the pacific coast highway are all my pleasures.
I am an accountant, so the bulk of my work involves taxes, bookkeeping, business management, etc. I work for myself and am building my business here.
Please send me a PM with a picture of you. I will send you a photo of me then.
submitted by sushilover19 to r4r [link] [comments]

2020.06.06 06:31 harukaze39 UCSD vs UCLA? Help pls!

Hi! I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this, but I'm having a difficult time deciding whether to attend UC San Diego for neurobiology or UCLA for psychobiology in the fall. I recently got off the waitlist to UCLA and it's been one of my top choice schools since high school (I'm a second year transfer student). However, UCSD is well known for STEM majors and its research. For that reason, my parents want me to attend UCSD but the psychobiology major at UCLA sounds more attractive to me. That said, I know I will have to go to some kind of grad school, whether that be med school, pa school, etc. (tbh I'm not sure what I will be pursuing) and a high gpa will be very important. I'm not sure if this will be more difficult at UCSD or UCLA. I also realize I might feel a bit more comfortable at UCSD as an introvert rather at the rather daunting UCLA atmosphere. Thoughts?
submitted by harukaze39 to ApplyingToCollege [link] [comments]

2020.05.20 19:40 surfh2o Kinda just want to put my whole relationship on paper here...comment if you like

This is going to be long and I don't care, just looking to put thoughts down.
Before I met my wife in HS, I had my first love. I lived in the middle of no where with minimal friends close by. I was about 13 when I met her. I kind of instantly had a crush on her and soon began going over and hanging out with her often. She was about 1 year older. Not really knowing how to tell her I liked her we just stayed friends. Then just hooked up with her boyfriend that lived close, soon the 3 of us were inseparable, I'm sure I was the 3rd wheel but didn't know it. They would ask me to hang out and stuff. I was best friends with both, although I always had a crush on her. Time went on and when I was 16, over the summer one night she wanted to stay over. Since she was just a friend it was no big deal. I told her she could sleep in my room and I'll be on the couch. She said no, sleep in here. Still not getting the clue, I told her I would sleep on the floor. That's when she told me I could sleep in the bed with her. There was no hesitation as we immediately went to it. Years of best friends and having a crush on her.
Obviously, I fell hard. When she left the next morning I got a call from her that she had just told her boyfriend.. basically my best friend at this point. He came down, pissed obviously. I told him sorry and he could hit me. We didn't talk for a while and her and I began to see each other. She bounced back and forth between us over the next few months. She eventually moved to another state. I had a hard time moving on from that. I got depressed and found out that I didn't really want a relationship with anyone else, just sex. At around 16, I was mowing through a few women here and there.
I began hanging out with a group of friends where I met my wife. My friend had already had sex with her and asked what I thought about her. I told him.. yeah I'd hit it. We began to hang out with those friends more. I found out she liked me. She called me one night and told me she needed to talk and to come over. I went over and she threw herself on me, and we had sex. I'm trying to think back but we hadn't really even built much of a friendship. Just hanging out occasionally and around each other with other friends around.
We hooked up quick. I was digging it but still always thought about the 1st love. So st that time wife and I were together for about a month when I found out my 1st love was coming back in town for like a week. I was excited and told current GF (wife) that I had to hang with her, dick move I know, but it happened. 1st love came down, we had a great time, had sex, she left. Of course, it wasn't long after she left I was trying to get back with my GF (wife). She was hurt, but took me back. I want to say it happened again and my 1st love came down again and everything repeated. GF (wife) and I got back together again. I still had thoughts of 1st love obviously and for a LONG time. But GF(wife) helped me not think about it. I did start enjoying time with my future wife. We were pretty solid our senior year.
I find out later in life my wife had some deep emotional shit. When she was like 15/16 she had an older boyfriend. This dude broke into houses and went to jail. She used to bring him drugs to jail/prison. This was basically her first love. She had his name tatted on her ankle when she was like 15/16. She had also been raped by 2 guys when she was maybe 13, 14, 15. Then with the shit I had done to her early in our relationship when I went back to that other girl twice early in our relationship. She always deeply loved me, almost to the point of obsessive. I began to notice during our senior year and later on that she didn't have trust in me, had jealousy and insecurities, some of which she had good reason I suppose.
After high school she ended up moving in with me at my parents house. In visiting a friend one day we found a lost husky pup that we adopted. We started looking for our own place and needed one that would take our dog. We found a shitty HUD home that needed tons of work but it had a fence for the dog so we jumped in. We lived there for a few years, everything was.. Ok.. Not a fairy tale but we were okay. She was still very insecure and jealous and didn't like it if I went anywhere without her. She would give me guilt trips about leaving her. I just wanted to go surfing with a friend for example and she would give me hell. This went for a while and I just dealt with it. It was very hard at times and wasn't easy to deal with. We had bought this house basically on my 20th birthday, we started young. Over the next few years she kind of started letting herself go, or maybe it was just me, but she began to gain some weight. I began to feel I wasn't 100% into our relationship but pressed on. She would feel that I wasn't 100% into her and I guess that was true. Still giving me hell over jealousy and insecurities. I never really gave her much reasons during these times. She did catch me with porn and took that really bad. I still did have an eye for other women, but didn't actively seek so I figured that was just being a normal young man.
We did a lot of work on our home and started making it look good. This was during the house boom so we started really creating value in our home, plus the market was booming. She continued to gain weight and my eye started to turn more and more. When I was 25, I met a cute girl at a concert and just started drifting away from my GF(wife). I ended up moving out and got an apartment for a bit. I had never been on my own so I felt that I kind of needed that at 25 and where I was at. My GF was obviously hurt but it was also her jealousy, insecurities and weight gain that was pushing me away. I sowed some oats and her and I started seeing each other again. My 6 month lease was up and I guess I felt it was time for me to get back home with her. She had lost some weight, I had gotten to see what other women were like. 6 months was really a short time, but I was comfortable with her over these other women. She wasn't the hottest thing for me and I wasn't madly in love. However, I was comfortable with her. We got back together and things were fairly good. Over the past few years, even before I moved out she had put a lot of pressure on me to marry her. I was on the fence but was also turned off by the immense pressure she put on it. My parents had divorced and I knew a lot of marriages end in divorce so I wanted to be careful too.
Surprise!!!! She gets pregnant. Yeah, I have to admit that I was like oh shit!! Do I really love this girl? Do I really want a kid? Do I want to be a Dad? Am I ready to be a Dad? Of course ultimately I accepted the fact. Heck I was about 28-29 at this time and had been with this woman since high school. I'm going to just jump in, be a good Dad. So yeah, I kind of was like... "I'll marry you now". I mean obviously it wasn't quite like that but in a way it was like that. We eloped when she was like 5 months pregnant. Yeah sure I was having second thoughts and did I think she was the most perfect woman in the world? No, but I'm going to give this a go. Okay, maybe not the best way to start a marriage.
We have a beautiful boy, we love him dearly and he is our life. The wife and I still had some issues, but for the most part things were good. We sold our first home after 11 years of ownership. We made $133k off it and bought an upgraded, nice home. Things were good... then they started to go a bit downhill. I guess you can say I focused too much on judging her. I began to notice that she would eat like a starving fat man, she would chug beer. She would eat more than I would and devour food. My attraction to her began to fade. She was gaining weight... our son was about to turn 4. I began to feel vulnerable to straying. I wasn't that happy. She was still very insecure, jealous and would give me shit for going out to have a beer with a friend, even if it was like once every other month. I really have never had many friends and I've never been the type of person to go out often, but she would see me as like this player or someone that went out often. Plus, I didn't help things because I wouldn't tell her I loved her enough or tell her she looked good. In truth, I began to feel that she didn't look good, with the weight gain and her attitude towards me. We began pushing each other away.
So all this is happening, my son is almost 4. My eye is starting to wander more and more. I'm not looking for it, because maybe I'm pathetic with no self confidence, maybe I was just comfortable with the home life. Maybe in some ways I did feel that if something better comes along then so be it, whatever happens happens kind of mentality.
During this time we take a trip to see a friend in San Diego. I'm blown away by all the pretty women I'm suddenly seeing, I can't help myself. At the SD zoo I was even taking pictures of butts and pretending I was taking pics of animals. I know this low, and I'm not proud of it. I think maybe it was a way that I knew my wife would see it and realize that she should drop some weight for me. I would have never been able to tell her to her face that I wanted her to drop some lbs.
After this trip I had another trip planned with my buddy to go on a bro surf trip to Nicaragua. I think my wife didn't want me to go obviously but she was like "do what you want I guess". Surfing has always been my passion. We had a very troubled flight with cancellations, plane trouble, delays, etc. We missed a full 2 days from our trip. Got stuck in Miami for a bit. When we finally board the plane on Miami to Nicaragua, a beautiful woman sat right beside me. My buddy initiated conversation with her because again, I'm an introverted coward. We hit it off with her, a very interesting person. My buddy insisted we get her contact info and for her to come visit us at the beach while there. He's married too BTW. We get her info and when we get to our location he asks me to contact her. I told him no many times and there is no way she would come to visit us many hours drive from where she was staying in the big city. I don't know why, I think just to appease him and show him that she wouldn't contact us back I sent her an email. She responded and said she wanted to see us. I couldn't believe it. In her emails is was apparent that she had eyes for me and not him. Long story short, she comes out and we just hit it off. I hid the fact I was married with a kid. She felt like I wasn't telling her everything and I felt like I could tell her anything. Sometimes a new person you meet that is essentially a stranger and in this situation you feel you can tell them anything. I told her I was married with a kid and wasn't happy. She also revealed her thing to me.. which isn't relevant. We talked and cried all night. We got some sleep, my buddy woke up early to go surf and I stayed with her. We had amazing sex, spent the day together and then she left. We stayed in contact for months.
I basically fell in love with this woman. We talked for hours on end some days while I was at work. Few months later, my wife saw our cell records and saw these long daily calls. I got busted, downplayed it the best I could. I felt her and I could get to a better place but I also do feel I was ready to sacrifice my happiness for my son. I also realized that maybe what I had was just a fling, as good as it felt I knew a lot of that was just the excitement of something new and the possibilities of the grass being greener on the other side. I went to counseling, she went to counseling, we went together. Things seems to get a little better but I was still unsure about us. She started losing weight and getting my attention again.
BAM!!! surprise!! kid #2. I can't even believe this crossed my mind before, but I actually told her I wasn't sure if I wanted her to keep the baby. This brings me to tears to even think that now. She tells me she's having the baby. During a crazy incident, I end up delivering my own baby at home. It's a girl and I fall in love with her. My family feels complete again. I have my boy, my girl. My wife is looking good to me. Everything is good. I bought her diamond earrings for Christmas that year. She had always wished a man that loves her would buy her diamond earrings.
We've been through a lot with my son as he has ADHD and dyslexia. I've been at my job for almost 20 years so the repetitiveness is really kicking in on that front. The stress of life really starts kicking in. My wife is working, I'm working, we have a baby and a young difficult boy. Things are good on the surface but also stressful. Daycare was really expensive, so on and so forth. Life is hard.
Our work/life balance started to get affected. I was stressing myself out more on the home front trying to do my part and keep up with everything. I would come home from work and bust my ass cooking and cleaning so when she came home with the kids we could have a clean place, dinner served and enjoy our night as a family. I didn't really feel appreciated for all I would do. I would really go crazy doing everything, to the point of extreme stress. In hindsight I should've have let things just be more. I just didn't want me wife to look down on me for not doing more and I wanted to do more for us.
My wife gets a new job, she starts to tell me her boss is abusive and that on most days she cries 3 times a day in the bathroom. I supported her fully to quit. She got another job and ultimately didn't like that one either. In an effort for more work/life balance I tell her to quit that job too and try being a real estate agent. This way she's basically her own boss. It will be tough for a while but we can afford it. On the flip side, she'll be able to help out more around the house. Give some effort to the house/fam and give effort towards real estate. I knew she wasn't going to be able to jump right in and make big money. I was pretty sure in her first year she wouldn't make more than $20k, I didn't have much of an expectation immediately. She even asked me when she started that since she'll be working from home would I like it if she pulled the kids from daycare and after school Taekwondo. I told her no, keep them in. I told her I want her to focus on herself, her RE license and building her business.
In my opinion, she didn't focus on that or other priorities. She began to indulge in her hobbies, refinishing furniture, etc. She started this thing we call "Trashing". Where she would find stuff that might look usable on people's curbs or in the trash. I have to admit that she actually would find some really good stuff sometimes. A lot of this stuff we use all the time, our furniture, some of our clothes. She's sold a bunch of stuff before. But she's also gotten a lot stuff that actually IS trash, a waste of time/effort and the fact that she lost track of priorities with chores at home, building her RE business and kind of lost focus of me and the kids.
Then I started noticing that when I would come home from work she would cook dinner, which was nice, but then she would be out. Basically, straight to the bedroom, TV on and lay there all night until she went to sleep. There were times she would be in the bed watching TV starting at like 7. I would clean the house, clean up dinner, spend time with the kids, homework, make them brush teeth, get in bed, read bedtime stories. She wasn't really present for that. I would end up coming to bed. She wouldn't offer to change it to something we could both watch or turn it off to have some "US" time. I can say that during our entire relationship our sex life was pretty good. Throughout 24 years I would say we averaged 2-3 times per week including the real good times and low times. During the last 2 years we started a pretty fast decline. She started to gain more weight, lost track of priorities, gave little effort towards real estate. She pulled my son from public school without telling me to start home schooling him. I would get up early, go to work and try to get home and have fam time. There were days when I didn't sleep well and couldn't go to work. I would sleep in. That's when I found out she doesn't wake to an alarm clock, gets up when her body says it's time. She wouldn't start school with my son until about 10. He would have breaks/recess and by 3 he would be done. I began to get concerned that he wasn't learning as much as he could.
February, super bowl night. My wife got shit faced hammered. She tried to carry our daughter from the care and almost dropped her. She never made it to bed and fell asleep on the floor with her pants around her ankles because her boots were still on and couldn't get her pants off and just passed out like that. I took a pic and texted it to her the next day to show her how she was looking to me. She said she had a problem. I told her I'll get rid of all alcohol right now and help her. She demanded that she go to rehab. I honestly didn't think her problem was that bad. I had bottles of alcohol in the house for months that were still there unopened. She said she needed to go. I told her we can do this and we should try this step first by trying at home. I remove all alcohol from the house and tell her I'll never drink again either.
The next day I come home from work, the kids are there age 5 and 11 and she's gone. I found a note and realized she left for rehab. Her family kept me in the dark, wouldn't tell me where she went or when she'll be back. Her dad drove about 9 hours down to stay with me a few weeks to help out. He did help out but was also a jerk the whole time. Then later I find out he was analyzing my every move and telling her mom things about me that simply weren't true. He over embellished everything to make me sound like a bad person. My life was in turmoil. My son was homeschooled by my wife via an online school. I had no idea how it worked or what to do. I still had a full time job to manage and her dad wasn't much help with the school. For the first 2 weeks I simply couldn't work to try to manage everything. I started to figure out his school and found out that he had over 100 overdue assignments that had an absolute cutoff date 3 weeks out. He had over 100 lessons, quizzes, tests, presentations, essays due no later than 3 weeks from then. I had to do his tests, quizzes, my mom was writing his essays, we got him to do as much as he could. I remember being up late at night trying to crush down all his quizzes because there wasn't enough time. That month was hell.
I had my wife's phone while she was in rehab. Towards the end of her stay I received a text from someone that she has apparently made friends with while there. The text said something like. "I heard you were out of the joint". There was another text from another friend that was similar. I was like.. this sounds like they think she's out. I didn't know she was out if she is. I texted the number back that this was her husband and I didn't know she was out.. is she out? The phone rang and the friend just said.. She met a guy and left with him. Click. I texted her mom about the friend text and that it sounded like she was out. Her mom continued to keep me in the dark and told me she didn't know anything. I texted back that if no one can tell me where she is then I'm calling the police. I then immediately got a call from her sister to tell me that my wife was there. I asked to talk to her, she told me she was at the hair salon. She hadn't called me or the kids when she got out of rehab.
I finally talked to her that night and told her I was hurt she didn't call me or the kids. It was then that she told me she not only went to rehab for alcohol but it was from me and our relationship. She she said I was part of her bad addiction. She had those scars from before me and with me that she couldn't let go of them. She had always been the one chasing me and realized we only got married because she was pregnant. I judged her, I cheated, we split a few times, things that go back to times in high school. We both had been basically settled. In some ways yes this was true but I felt there was more to our 24 years than that. I always hoped for the best for us. I guess we both kept trying and trying and to some degrees we had a toxic relationship. She said she was coming home as soon as her sister could bring her here 6 hours. I told her I would come for her right away (she always wanted me to fight for her). She agreed and the next day I left the kids in bed and hit the road, my mom came over shortly.
I couldn't wait to see her, it had been about 40 days. While driving my mom called me, she had received a call from Mother in Law. She told my mom I should turn back. At this point I felt her family was speaking for her. I called my wife and told her this and she said she's having a hard time but she wants me to get her. I press the gad pedal to get up there ASAP. A few hours in I try to call her again to see how she's doing, no answer, repeat ad nauseam. I'm worried, press the gas pedal and max the cars speed out, hitting about 110-120. I get to her sisters house, knock on the door, no answer. Check the knob and open the door, yelling her name to no avail. I find her stuff where she was sleeping. She's no where to be found. I'm freaking out. I call my mom, she calls me back minutes later and says my wife is in ER and may have tried to hurt herself. Didn't know which hospital and race to each one until I find her. They won't let me see her. Her sisters come out and tell me to leave. I'm so hurt, confused, mentally/physically ill at this point.
I texted with her sisters for while but ultimately had to leave.. I have to young kids at home and another 6 hour drive. That was the worse drive of my life, coming back without my partner of 24 years. The mother of my children and she's in the ER and I have to turn back. My wife goes to a psych ward. Apparently she had said she wanted to hurt herself. I found out that before rehab she took like 10 zolofts hoping she wouldn't wake up. I talked to her a few time in psych ward and she sounded great. Told me she would be home soon.
She arrived on my daughters 6th birthday. I was so excited to see her but didn't know how to act. We had a good day with the kids. That night she told me that our whole 24 years had been shit. I never loved her, never did this or that. As much as I had also felt the same about her and our relationship and as much "bad" as there had been I was crushed. Maybe it was fear of losing her or fear of the strain on the kids, breaking up the fam. But I was also pissed at myself for not doing more in the relationship. Not complimenting her enough, judging her, the indiscretion, and so on. I begged her not to leave. She said she had made up her mind. I asked her plan and she said she wanted to move far away with the kids. With everything she had been through I was worried she would take off with the kids. I filed an emergency custody order, which that takes time to go through.
During the next few days I was trying to do what ever I could to change her mind. Then we discussed her plan further and she said basically I would sign over the kids and she would move at least 6 hours away. I had to tell her I would fight with all my might for that not to happen. She was flabbergasted that I wanted them that much. She thought I would easily sign my rights over. I was in shock that she thought that. I think it was during this time that she realized I would probably have a better chance at getting the kids than her. She seemed to change her tone a bit. It wasn't long after this we had sex. She seemed to kind of want to start working things out. I knew there was no way to being 100% immediately although that is what I wanted. During this time I was trying really hard to do more of the things she wished that I had done before. I started complimenting her more and showing her more physical affection like touching her. She had a hard time reciprocating.
I had asked her about this guy and told her about her friend calling me and telling me she met a guy and left with him. She denied and denied. So during this time she was sleeping upstairs. I had went up there for one reason or another and heard her on the phone. I went to go back downstairs but hung out in the stairwell. I heard her whisper something along the lines of "I wish you were holding me right now". I went back upstairs and told her what I heard. She hesitantly finally admitted it and said it was that guy. When she left rehab she did visit him for a few hours, they walked around, they did kiss and that's it, I didn't believe it. I then basically asked her to choose right now if he wants to move forward with me then she needs to delete him from FB. She had a really hard time with it and that night she didn't delete him. I told her that she made her choice then. Then the next day she deleted him. Things started to get a bit better with us. I think we had sex a few more times. Then she would pull back again. She said she needed to go see her mom and just get some time away to see her parents. I didn't want her to go. She left suddenly and took my 6 yo daughter. While she was at her moms, her communication was just not there. I would text her something and she wouldn't answer for hours or the next day. Mind you when she left we were kind of on the upswing again. I sent her flowers, something I was never good at in the past. So I was trying to make that extra effort and to surprise her with beautiful flowers. She did call that night and thanked me bunch for them. She was there about a week, texted me on her last day things were a bit clear now. She loves me and will be coming home the next day.
The next day she never tells me that she left or is on the road. I try to call/text her off/on over the next 4 hours.... nothing back. She finally calls me and said her phone was on silent and didn't check her phone until she just got gas. Said she will be home in a few hours. I was feeling good about her coming back. She gets back, things are good. She jumps my bones and things are on the up again. Then she basically tells me she wants space again. Wants us to take a step back, maybe work on being friends and rebuild slowly. I over hear her talking about getting a place. I was hurt and confronted her. She was like yeah she wants to work on US but live separate. She feels being around each other puts a rush on her feelings. I understand that but also don't want her to move out. However, I was happy she said she wants us to work, I felt I would basically do anything for us to work, even if that meant she moves out. I didn't want her to but if she did then I'd have to accept it. Well I still kept getting weird vibes and that maybe she didn't want us to work out. I had asked her more about this guy and she said it was nothing over and over. I embarrassingly ended up putting a voice recorder in her car. After only 1 day in her car I captured some pretty interesting conversation with this guy. Followed with full blown facetime sex. Her talking about licking the tip, she's wet.. the whole 9 yards.. moaning/groaning. I confronted her with it, saying how do you want to try working on "US" when you're doing this. She said it was only for fun blah blah. She had told him she was moving out and wants him to come down. She says she would never let that happen lol, like I'm stupid. After discussing the explicit recording she aggressively jumps me. I resist her and tell her no and stop. She is straddled on top of me using her weight against me forcing her tongue in my mouth as I fight to keep it closed. I moved my head side to side to try to get her tongue out of me. I then had enough and flipped her over and began to violently fuck her from that back with both hands around her throat. We then had sex the next morning.
She then tells me all about this guy. She had been in a bad place with our relationship, alcohol, leaving her fam for rehab, and then she saw him and it was like a light of hope. They were exchanging notes in rehab like they were in school. She met some girlfriends there and things started looking up for her. She realized alcohol was no good for her an neither was I. She says she still wants to try for us to work despite it sounding like she fell in love with this guy. I immediately take her there and we have sex again. Then things went down again. I've been dragged over the coals over and over. She still tells me she wants space, no more sex, she sleeps upstairs. She isn't sure she can get a place because she has no income. She's trying to get a job. I tell her we'll be cool, she can stay upstairs and I'll try to keep my distance. She still says she wants us to work out, just rebuild slowly.
So I decide to ask my daughter about her trip she took with mom to grandparents. I ask her if she met any of mommies friends. No, but she met Uncle J's friend. Long story short, I tread lightly, show her a pic of the man I think wife is talking to/met at rehab. I show her the pic and say.. is this Uncle J's friends she says YES. I ask her over and over she's like YES Dad. So no shit, I find out that when my wife left to visit her mom 9 hours away. She stopped and picked up this guy with my daughter and brought him up to her moms. They stayed there for a week and then dropped him off on the way back. She comes home and fucks the shit outta me, guilt fucked me. Dude I about lost it. She claims that he relapsed and she had to help him and took him to a safe place. She claims they've NEVER had sex, which I call complete BS obviously. She tells me that he can't get hard, I'm like that's BS he's 43 not 94. She claims he's on so many meds. Mind blowing shit. She finally came out about which I told her yeah you came out with everything because there's nothing left to find out.
We had counseling yesterday and it went really well. I feel there is some hope and I'm slightly optimistic about our future. Are we just completely toxic for each other and neither of us knows how to end it or can people recover from this. She has underlying issues, mentally/emotionally, anxiety, depression, they've recently told her she might have bipolar. I'm also trying to figure out if I should even continue with all we've been through. I think we do love each other SOO much but we're not IN love. Can we, have we ever, etc? I almost want to find someone that's a better fit for me but then I also don't want to find someone else. This whole thing has kind of made me realize how much I do love her, I would do anything for her, she can drag me through the dirt and I'm still here. Why?
I feel in some ways I've taken her for granted in the past, I didn't see what I had. I couldn't see the forest for the trees so to speak. I feel like I now accept her for all that she is and all that she isn't. Is it because of what she did to me, I don't know. The threat/fear of her leaving or being alone or splitting up the fam. I don't know. I just feel we can work through it, but again and as she's said... we've been trying for 24 years. All those years she was chasing me and I wasn't giving her what she needed and now the roles have reversed and I'm chasing her. Is the the fact I know that another dude wants her, I don't know. I mean I know a woman can pretty much pick a dude for the most part anyways so.
Anyways, I know this is long and for anyone that cares to read and respond can. I'm not really looking for much advice.... just getting my thoughts and feelings down on paper really.
submitted by surfh2o to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.05.17 01:37 KingOfHell1661 The most replaceable MCU actor/s?

Having watched each MCU movie at least once, I can't help but wonder if every casting has been spot on. Personally I won't cover every single villain/hero, I'll just pick the ones I wonder about the most. Feel free to add your own picks.
Tons more I could include, but I'll leave them up to you. Go on, make me proud.
submitted by KingOfHell1661 to marvelstudios [link] [comments]

2020.05.16 13:01 vudoo781 I (28M) have feelings for 2 different people (25F) and (22F) but we're all in different parts of the world.

So I (28M) live in MA, and i met a friend (25F) (lets say Kay) online last year around April. we started talking and kinda video calling at all hours of the night. But she lives in Hawaii so the distance was obviously an obstacle. The problem is that I never tried to initiate conversations, and she would have to call or text me first. Its just the introvert in me, and the fact that I personally dont think my life is that interesting enough to warrant starting conversations. And i also dont enjoy small talk, so having this distance complicated things for me. Despite a few months of us talking and being in a long distance "relationship" neither of us really considered it a real dating relationship and she "broke up" cause of my lack of communication. We attended a large scale event together in september in san diego and we barely talked, cause I knew she was still upset with me about my communication skills. She eventually started dating someone, but im not sure when or how long that lasted. we sort of talked about it a few months ago and how it we never really "dated" but things mellowed over, and we're living our lives but occasionally talk to each other.
Now another friend (23F) (lets call her Jules) and I started talking as well probably around January, but she lives in the Philippines. My lack of communication is still a problem, at least to me, but J still talks to me and we flirt a bit. But I'm not sure if i'm in love with her. Kay knows about Jules and I talking and being in a "psuedo relationship." I think Jules thinks its real, even though i dont think it is, and im afraid of breaking her heart, but im also not sure if she thinks this is just temporary or if there's something more, and she recently joked about "getting married" while we were both in a public online server (the host created a wedding setting on their island in Animal Crossing)
Now Kay and I were playing Animal Crossing and i found a rare statue through time traveling, and she jokingly asked me "Can you find one for me bby". Later that day, she asked if i blushed when she called me bby, and then our conversation led to the admission that we both still like each other, and that she only called me bby cause she was thing about me. and I'm just not sure what to do. I dont think i can really realistically act on either relationship, as they both live thousands of miles away from me. I dont want to break Jules's heart and tell her our relationship is not gonna work out, and basically choose Kay over Jules, but i also dont want to lead either girl on. Kay and I already had issues with our relationship last year so im not sure things will change going forward, unless i can somehow change a core part of my own behavioral personality (which is basically me being introverted and generally quiet and usually just dont feel like i have anything to offer in conversation)
submitted by vudoo781 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.05.02 20:23 sandyeggo91 My partner (23/F) and I (26/M) are going to get an apartment together but I have strong reservations

I’m drafting this post because I could really use some advice to help me sort out my feelings, also I hope the act of writing these feelings out helps me sort some of them out for myself. Me (M/26) and my partner Emma (F/23) have been dating for almost two years. She goes to UCLA I live in San Diego. We met while she was home over the summer and did the better part of the next year long distance, meeting half way from our respective dwellings once a month and seeing each other over holidays. She has since graduated and moved back to her parents house fifteen minutes away from my apartment and we’ve taken to having a regular relationship.

Since she’s moved back there’s been talk, in passing, about us getting an apartment together, which seemed like the natural next step in our relationship. I’ve always been hesitant, however, in big part because my last SO and I moved to a big city together and our shared living situation became very isolating and conflict ridden leading to a major step back in my life. It’s been a year since Emma’s been back from school now and my apartment situation has become cramped as has her situation at her parent’s house and the situation of a mutual friend of ours. All signs are pushing the three of us to chip in on a place.

Now, I know I said that I’m a little scarred from that situation with my ex where sharing my space turned into a really negative experience. If it were just that, I would bite the bullet and try my best not to dwell in the past and to work through this with Emma. I’m concerned, however, that there are some factors pertaining to Emma and I’s relationship that make this decision difficult for me.

The first thing is this feeling that there is a constant push and pull when it comes to boundaries in our relationship already. I tend to need a lot of alone time to “recharge”: sort out my thoughts, let feelings about interactions settle, invest time into personal hobbies. Emma is in some ways the opposite. She has trouble sleeping alone. She favorite thing is spending time with other people. When we’re not together she wants to talk on the phone at every opportunity. In ways this has been good for me. It has helped me to be to be a bit less precious about my personal introspection and has helped me to become more empathetic, patient and understanding towards people who are primarily fueled by interpersonal interaction. In other ways I find it kind of frustrating and intrusive. I don’t really remember the last time I had a long stretch of time to just be by myself. Sometimes I feel smothered by this. It’s hard for me to balance and respond appropriately to this push and pull between us because it’s hard for me to sort out when my “introverted” qualities (for lack of a better word) and her “extroverted” qualities (same disclaimer) are smashing up against each other in a benign, a healthy or in a toxic way. This of course makes me hesitant about making this huge jump.

The second thing that really concerns me going into this is our sexual relationship. It’s not really easy for me to talk about these things but I’ll try my best. There’s a few things here… One is that Emma is somewhat unconfident in bed. We’ve worked on this together and it has improved but it still can be very difficult at times. Her personal hygiene is also not always her top priority we’ve talked about this and it has also improved somewhat. She also doesn’t always neccesarily prioritize wearing clothes that fit her well. I’ve taken her out shopping and we’ve bought some clothes and she’s been excited to wear them and wears them often but she won’t really take the initiative to invest in nice clothes herself or throw out beat up articles. I feel superficial for being concerned with some of these things but at the same time can’t bring myself to not be concerned about them.

These difficulties in my attraction toward her and my hesitations regarding boundaries really make me feel shaky about our relationship.

This is really difficult for me because in many ways this relationship has grown emotionally deep in a way that past relationships for me have not necessarily been. We’ve both grown so much since this began and I truly love her from deep in my soul. I think she’s an amazing, incredible, talented person and I care about her so much but I don’t feel in love with her. That’s especially hard because she is so head over heels in love with me. If I left her, I know, it would destroy her and I just don’t know if I have it in me to do that, I care for her so much. I feel like I’m driving with one foot on the gas and one foot on the brake and I don’t know how to lift either. If I were to break up with her tomorrow it would catch her extremely off guard but I don’t know how to share my concerns in an honest way when she is constantly showering me with love and affection. I often feel like I reciprocate this affection out of habit or to not upset her.

I would love any constructive comments, thank you reddit.

TL;DR My partner and I have decided to move in together but I don't feel like I'm in love with her but I can't deal with breaking her heart.
submitted by sandyeggo91 to relationships [link] [comments]

2020.04.26 07:08 jvu404 Tough Decision between 2 CA Schools

Got into CE at SJSU with Humanities Honors (15/39 core lower GE units finished) and Math-CS at UCSD. Love UCSD cause it’s too far away. My major isn’t fit cause I’m don't want to do math (I could change) considering CogSci (Human Development) which is number 1 in the nation and I love the studious vibe ( very introverted, reserved, and not into partying lol). I'd love to do casual Esports gaming at UC San Diego and I know some people I could possibly connect with here.
Live close to SJSU but the school itself feels like lame high school and doesn’t have on campus support and environment/student involvement like UCSD. Keep it mind that engineers at SJSU on average graduate in 5-6 years to get a B.S. degree. By the way, I loved UC San Diego's campus in contrast to my parents who said it had a cold, distant vibe and feel to it. That being said, I feel that UC San Diego's on-campus experience is phenomenal and allows me to create interpersonal relationships and creative STEM projects/career portfolio that would exceed what I could do at SJSU as a commuter student.
For career options, I want to explore UI-UX front web development, software engineering, and back-end and front-end frameworks so should I choose SJSU for CE undergrad or UCSD for CogSci (human dev)... I will probably end up reviewing Calculus I [I need to! :) ] in college so I'm wondering if this would impact my decision .
What should I choose? I want to go to UCSD for undergrad but I’m afraid I’m not mature enough to go away from home!!! I feel that given COVID-19, it will make life more difficult cause I live in San Jose, California. How do I prove to my parents that I am mature enough even though they carried me my whole life?? Or does every kid who moves to college feels like a lost and indecisive individual?
Need help ASAP! Deadline is May 1st for UC San Diego. By the way, SJSU moved their SIR to June 1st due to COVID-19 concerns. Thank you all for helping me decide during this stressful time!
Prestige doesn’t matter because I want to go into industry and get my MS in the future.
View Poll
submitted by jvu404 to ApplyingToCollege [link] [comments]

2020.04.05 06:45 aclockworktale BU vs UCSD for neuroscience!

hi guys!! im having a tough time deciding between these two schools for neurobiology, so any help is appreciated!! i know this is a BU sub so it'll obviously be biased, but any perspective is appreciated, especially if any of u had to make a similar decision
- i have a 25k scholarshipat BU, so my tuition is around 52k, as compared to 62k at UCSD bc no scholarship
- UCSD is without a doubt ranked higher for neurobiology. UCSD is #11, BU is #45
- im not v good with cold, so San Diego wather is defintiely better than weather in Boston for me
- boston has tons of other universities around it, wheras i dont think UCSD does. that either means that i have more opportunities at BU for internships and research, or it means that bc there are so many schools and people, opportunities are a lOT more competitive
- BU seems to have a more social and fun atmosphere with rlly good vibes, wheras UCSD seems more academically inclined. though im pretty introverted, i do wanna make a lot of friends and wanna have a good time at uni!
- the college ive been accepted to in UCSD has just been renovated and moved to a better location, so itll be newer dorms compared to the ones at BU
PLS PLS help ive been thinking about this continously for more than a week and still cant decide i need help
submitted by aclockworktale to BostonU [link] [comments]

2020.03.29 18:17 readysetlame Seeking a friend for the end of the world

31/M- San Diego (chula)
If you don’t care to read my long backstory (I understand) you can skip to the bottom to learn about me!
Hey reddit! So I’m 31, I am 1 year married with a 1 year old, if you do the math it was an oopsie baby but I am happy with my little family. I am also an introvert that feels like I never quite have a connection with anyone who hasn’t had friends in 6 years now. I lost my large group of friends that I once had because I finally stood up to them after years of being their doormat.
I have never regretted that decision but 6 years later, I still have not made one real friend. Sure coworker happy hours here and there but once you quit a job, those relationships usually don’t last.
This quarantine has been tough on me and my little family, we have a very small apartment, our daughter just learned to really run and move and being cooped up is really tough for her. I’m starting to run out of things to do myself and Netflix shows. Lol.
Anyway, I hope we have all learned something during this time, something we would do differently or want to change about ourselves or the world around us. For me, it’s making a dam friend. I don’t want to still be here going on 40 years old, still no friends, not one person to have a beer with. What I want to change is to go out more and enjoy life outside of my home just a little more. So about me:
Favorite movies: DC movies, marvel movies-in that order, although Endgame was like the best theater experience I’ve ever had, back to the future trilogy, Superbad etc..
Favorite bands: the black keys, Mumford and sons, rise against, blink 182, Led Zeppelin, etc..
Favorite food: almost everything except pickles so standouts are wings, pizza, shake shack burgers
Hobbies: videos games (Xbox-Fifa, halo, gta recently etc), craft beer drinker (love me some beers-except sours), jogging (definitely puts me in a better place)
Sports: my passion is soccer (played until college-tore my acl, and watch almost every major league in the world-favorite team is LA Galaxy), used to be the biggest Chargers fan in the world when they were in San Diego (no longer care about them and rarely watch football anymore-heart broken), baseball is okay to go to but I cannot watch on tv. And that’s about it.
Favorite thing to do: probably go to a pub, order a bunch of appetizers and a few beers with hopefully some live music and just chill. A none food bar works too.
EDIT: I am not partial to anime, I understand this eliminates 95% of people on reddit
submitted by readysetlame to MakeNewFriendsHere [link] [comments]

Parenting introverts vs. extroverts ~ Conscious Parenting ABC 10 News - YouTube Welcome to the Black Parade but it's sung by Interactive Introverts Audiences Superjoint “The Introvert” Live Interactive Introverts in San Diego  Week 32  RealLife Kat Making Friends As An Introvert, Friendsgiving, Memoji  LIFE IN SAN DIEGO EXTROVERT NEBO INTROVERT? Dan Walter's Memorial - YouTube

What Introverts Love About San Diego HuffPost Life

  1. Parenting introverts vs. extroverts ~ Conscious Parenting
  2. ABC 10 News - YouTube
  3. Welcome to the Black Parade but it's sung by Interactive Introverts Audiences
  4. Superjoint “The Introvert” Live
  5. Interactive Introverts in San Diego Week 32 RealLife Kat
  6. Making Friends As An Introvert, Friendsgiving, Memoji LIFE IN SAN DIEGO
  8. Dan Walter's Memorial - YouTube
  9. KIMDOTS - YouTube
  10. Video captures tire slashing

Summit Music Hall Denver, CO October 4, 2017 Bixncaxlv (San Diego) (I know I spelled it wrong in the video, by the time I noticed it was too late to change it RIP me) ... Dan & Phil 'Interactive Introverts' Premiere Q&A in Brazil - Duration ... This week I celebrated my friend's job promotion through a going away party. Of course, November is not November without attending a couple of friendsgiving events. I call my home made dish ... Hi 😊! My name is Kim and I make lifestyle vlogs while living in SoCal! I grew up in the midwest, but moved to San Diego, California to live my best life. 📷 i... FOX 5 San Diego 340 views. 1:38. 8 Stupidly Expensive Things Michael Jordan Owns - Duration: 12:08. Rebound Central Recommended for you. 12:08. Parenting introverts vs. extroverts ~ Conscious Parenting ... She has been a regularly featured health and parenting expert on San Diego News 6 and Fox 5 San Diego and has been a guest on several ... Description San Diego's ABC affiliate and your definitive source of news, sports and weather. Have a news tip? Call (619) 237-6383 or visit George and I went to see Dan and Phil's show Interactive Introverts down in San Diego. The show was amazing (I think there are a few more shows, but I don't know where, GOOGLE IT) Look at my ... This video is unavailable. Watch Queue Queue. Watch Queue Queue